cate, parenting

Talk About Your Frustrations

Dear future self: Today, you were frustrated at your teenage daughter that she was 10 minutes later in leaving the house for high school. Even though she is the only one affected, you felt that it reflected on your personal value to be early or on time. You expressed to your daughter that you were […]

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cate, parenting

“Pink” College

(old post from 2007) Kate loves watching Blue’s Clues and especially one episode, “Steve goes to college”. So tonight, instead of reading she wanting me to tell her all about college. I used this perfect timing to tell her about learning and doing well in school. Kate: “Is there a pink college? I want to […]

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cate, parenting

C: Will I hate you when I’m a teenager?

The original post was in 2005, when C. was 5 years old. A few days ago, C asked “Dad, will I hate you as a teenager?” I was a bit caught off guard.  I told C that it’s possible that when kids grow into their teenage years, their hormones could change, and they will be testing the […]

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cate, parenting

30 Minutes Of Focus Time For Children And Adults

I spent Christmas night and the day after Christmas with my parents and my sister’s 2 kids. A 2 year old girl “C”. and 4 year old boy “M”. We all spent the morning filled with sounds of the TV and the new Nintendo games the kids got for Christmas. Thirty minutes before we are […]

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cate, food, parenting

Pink Lady Apple Popsicles (archive 2007)

Cate loves loves ice cream. In order to balance her craving against the saturated fats of ice cream, I make her popsicles out of strawberries, raspberries and apples. Her favorite is lady pink apple ones. 1) Take 6 lady pinks, wash and juice them 2) Take a cheese cloth and filter the juice 3 times […]

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cate, parenting, travel

Paris Trip Day 4 : Compromises (2008)

I’m usually not good at resolving conflicts. In the dating environment, I would just run away. At work, we’ll try to figure out the ‘right’ way and usually the ‘right’ way wins. With Cate, usually the only way that wins is to compromise Last night I was trying to convince Cate to fall asleep sooner […]

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badminton, cate, fatherhood, parenting

dreaming of father+daughter team

I have this fantasy of playing badminton with C. as a mixed doubles team. The C.+Tony dynamic duo! She is 12 years old, flying at the birdie in front of the net. Father Tony jumping and smashing from the back. We are both enjoying executing what we’ve been training to do during our weekly badminton training […]

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cate, parenting

Cute Kids Becoming Non-Cute Adults

You see it everywhere. People smiling a kids, commenting on how cute they are. I do the same thing on the metro here in Paris. Even when I look at Kate, I sometimes can’t help but smile at her. I imagine what will become of this wonderful human being. When do kids stop being cute […]

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cate, travel

Paris here we come again

Kate and I are heading for Paris tomorrow afternoon. She is super excited about it. She tells me she is looking forward to time with only Dad and no one else. She is looking forward to the crepes, and going up to the Eifel Tower when we first get there. I admit that I thrive […]

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cate, parenting

Happy 6th birthday my Kate

Kate turned 6 today. Happy birthday my little girl. It’s so wonderful to have you in my life. Having a child has taught me to look at life with a fresh pair of eyes. To look at life in a positive angle. She shows her feelings and her love without reservation and this is still […]

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cate, parenting

Prayer Of Love

Recently I started asking Kate if she would like to say a nightly prayer of love. I told her it’s when we just say thanks for our health and our good fortune and then we pray for health and happiness for everyone we love. This way it will magically keep the people we love healthy […]

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cate, parenting

Kate: “I want to be rich”

(photo is Kate’s. Happy Chinese New Years on the right bubble, “Dad” 爸 on the left red envelope, “Maternal grandfather” 公 on the right red envelope, the rest of the yellow I think are currencies?) I can’t recall how the conversation started, but I asked what Kate wants to be when she grew up. She […]

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cate, food, parenting

Chinese Dumpling Sunday

I had a craving for fresh Chinese dumplings on Friday and got my parents to pick up the ingredients from Chinatown. Friday my gf and I made a small batch enough to satisfy ourselves. Then this Sunday Kate and I finished up the entire batch. It really did hit the spot. Here is a recipe […]

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cate, inspiration, life goals

baggage of tradition

I used to know someone who didn’t like to be bounded by the traditions of her culture. She felt that tradition limited her in how she could behave or act. I loved this person a lot and I was influenced by her thoughts quite a bit. I’ve changed my mind in recent years. At the […]

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cate, parenting

Close to the heart

In Chinese we have a term 貼心 which literally translates to “close to the heart” and it’s usually used to describe daughters who are very close to their parents and especially their mothers. Ever since my foot injury, Kate has needed to make huge adjustments. Opening and holding doors for me, bringing her dinners to […]

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cate, coffee, parenting

No coffee for you Dad !!!

Kate and I got into an argument Monday morning, I think it was about wearing clothes or maybe I was slow in getting up in the morning. She wrote me a note “No Coffee For You Dad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” I asked her why I don’t get any coffee and she said K : “Because when you are […]

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cate, parenting

Kate’s sunday conversations

Some random bits of conversation between Kate and me K: “Dad, are you going to die before me?” me: “uhhh, I think so.” K: “but not for a long long long long time right?” me: “I hope so.” K: “Dad, even when you are angry, you still love me right?” me: “I’ll always love you” […]

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cate, parenting

Kate: I’m not a princess!

Me: (as I lay a cushion for her on the chair) You are my little princess. Kate: I’m not a princess, I don’t have a prince yet! It’s just you, dad. Me: chuckle.. That is very true, that almost makes perfect sense I love your logic Kate Kate: Why is that funny, Dad? Me: I […]

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cate, parenting

Kate’s PTA Meeting

Today I met with Kate’s French teachers.  Some cool highlights Kate is the leader in the advance French group Kate is well liked by all her classmates Kate is like a flower while the others are bees around her.  She doesn’t seek out friends, others seek her out She was very shy before, but she […]

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cate, parenting

I Should Have 10 More Kate’s

I dropped off Kate at school and her teacher came up and we chatted a bit. She was telling me that Kate is expressing herself well in French and she wanted to find out how ‘deep’ Kate’s vocabulary was.  Since I don’t know French, I couldn’t tell her :-)  But I’m sure it’s good enough. […]

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cate, parenting, travel

single dad traveling with a kid in Paris

Eiffel Tower, Seine River, Louvre Museum: from  5 year old’s perpective, she can care less. Where’s the ice cream place, crepes? tired of walking, not the metro again, are we there yet? Kate is a pretty good traveler, but thinking from her perspective, I can understand. My days with her here in Paris is not […]

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cate, parenting

Warning

warning Dad! Apparently Kate has learned the meaning of warning from one of the poems in Where the Sidewalk Ends.  Then she saw the warning signs about not putting your fingers between the doors in the Paris metro. The entire week, I’m getting warning drawings as I deny her a 2nd helping of ice cream.  […]

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cate, Cate's Musings, parenting, paris

Emergency: Don’t Touch The Hair

We were eating crepes and the waitress came over and ruffled Kate’s hair as a sign of affection.  Kate hates it when people touch her hair, so she drew this picture to give to the waitress. “Emergency when someone messed with her hair”.  Sometimes I feel like I’m living with a mute child :)

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cate, parenting

The Good And The So So

Kate arrived yesterday, her mom brought her over to Paris while traveling towards eastern Europe.  Kate was excited as was I to be reunited after a month. The good. We spent the day visiting a few food places around Rue Lepic, and I was introducing Kate to the vendors. The good The vendor selling tarts […]

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cate, parenting

Video: Kate Dancing In A Parade

Kate is coming to visit me for 2 weeks in Paris. This will be her 3rd time in Paris, hopefully we’ll get to chill and soak up summertime in Paris my silly Kate last summer dancing to a her own parade.  I’m actually getting a bit nervous, I haven’t seen her for 6 weeks now. […]

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cate, parenting

video: Cate Dancing In A Parade

Kate is coming to visit me for 2 weeks in Paris. This will be her 3rd time in Paris, hopefully we’ll get to chill and soak up summertime in Paris my silly Kate last summer dancing to a her own parade.  I’m actually getting a bit nervous, I haven’t seen her for 6 weeks now. […]

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cate, parenting

video: kate singing coccinelle

Kate is a very lucky girl indee in her exposure to different languages, especially in a country like the US where we are very mono-language focused.  It’s rare for a child to grow up being able to speak another language like a native She grew up with Chinese-mandarin as her first language because we didn’t […]

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cate, parenting

Video: Kate 2005: water tension experiment

I’m beginning to seriously miss Kate, so I’m revisiting her videos on my little 17″ powerbook. Everyone loves the San Francisco Exploratorium. There are hundreds of science experiments here. Kate’s favorite the first time she was there is this “water surface tension” experiment. You try to make as much water stay on top and not […]

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cate, parenting

Video: Kate: why I don’t want to play with this boy?

Ok, I’m easily amused by my daughter. But when we speak Chinese, it’s even funnier (at least to me). One day I asked her why she won’t play with this boy at school, here is our conversation while she was making crepes highlight here to the end for the transcript: Kate: Because his voice is […]

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cate, inspiration, kids programming, parenting

Memories

For all the moms and dads out there, really take the time to enjoy the first 5 years of your child’s life.  After they start school and learn how to reason with you, the relationship becomes very different.  I miss the days when Kate didn’t question anything.  I enjoy her current age, but I often […]

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cate, parenting

Yes Kate, No Dad

Kate got mad at me for some reason and went back to her table to write me a warning note. She first said I was in trouble :-( “From Kate For Tony” “Yes Kate, No Dad” “I am getting mad at you”

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cate, parenting

How To Talk About Death To Your Children (2006)

Cate has been watching Cinderella and other Disney movies which mention the subject of death of a family member. So she has been mentioning that subject to me. Does everyone die? Kids who are 5 years old don’t die for a long long time right? What does it mean to die? Dad, when are you […]

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cate, parenting

Saturday Food Day

Kate and I had a day full of good food. Fresh fettuccini pasta, french string beans, basil Chocolate fondue with organic fuji apple slices fresh lemon scones with all 7 color sprinkles Every color sprinkle is put on top of the scone for good measure Kate, the cook, trying out the chocolate Melting Dark Chocolate […]

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cate, food, parenting

Crepe Saturday With Kate

Just wanted to document my very long but leisurely day with my little girl so I don’t forget. Saturday morning started at 6:30 when Kate bounced up and asked me whether she could make crepes.  Of course, I love crepes.  She ran into the kitchen and got all the ingredients ready.  She measured the flour, […]

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cate, parenting

Lice! Lice!

Just got this email from Kate’s school, it doesn’t sound like the next few weeks will be fun. Time to give Kate a good scrub down just in case. Unfortunately, there have been some lice found in MK so we’re asking everyone to please stay aware so we can minimize any spreading. If you’re not […]

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cate, parenting

A Constant Force In Kate’s Life

I usually drive Kate to school on the day I work from home.  But this last time I was late by 10 minutes. I had to fill out a little tardy slip for Kate with the reason of ‘traffic’ as an excuse. I strolled leisurely to class with Kate and as I stepped in, 5 […]

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cate, parenting

Kate’s Back In School

Kate doesn’t like paparazzi Dad I finally figured out the immunization stuff for Kate, she is back in school and her teachers love her! She is speaking French to her teachers, doodling, playing with the seesaw, eating lunch with her classmates, pretending to nap, and building sand castles.

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cate, parenting

Kate I Let You Down :-(

Kate’s teachers tell me that it so nice having Kate at school, she is really happy there. Today Yahoo! let some of us leave work at 2:00pm to get started on the long weekend.  So I decided to pick up Kate from Berkeley and take her to get her shots so she won’t be kicked […]

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cate, parenting

Kate’s first day of school

Happy parents, happy kids, crying kids whose parents left too fast, socializing with teachers, proud parents, excited Kate. The first day school for Kate, I’m so proud of her. She will enjoy learning at the French American school so much. But I think she will love the corn meal sandbox the most

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cate, yahoo

Top 5 memories of Kate before she heads to school

Kate’s going to school next week, sniff.. now on to the memories She loves listening to Jack Johnson’s Sexy Plexy when she falls asleep, I would have it on for her to calm her down.  When I was in Paris with her, we listened to that before she fell asleep.  That one song always brings me […]

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cate, parenting

my 4 year old is smarter than I am

4 year old Kate is way smarter than I am She spots every little detail in her story books, facial expressions of all the characters in the page She remembers that there are 6 strings on the guitar without looking at it, I thought there were 7 She learns foreign languages so much better than […]

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cate, parenting

Cate: nap time

The only reason why I like driving on weekends, Kate gets a much needed nap. Heading into the city for some food at the Ferry Building, then kite flying at Crissy Fields, then watch a dance performance with Kate, my mom and sister in oakland. I’m getting a much needed tan sitting in traffic with […]

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cate, parenting

Kate and Tai Chi

Why the squid face? Pissed off at Dad Kate used to do Tai Chi with me, just the first 9 movements, when she was 2 years old. Recently I think I haven’t kept it up so she’s given up on me. Time for me to brush up on my 24 movements and get her interested […]

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cate, parenting

Kate: the 2nd year: Languages

First I would like to thank craigslist for helping us find all of our French and Japanese babysitters. Kate is blessed with the gift of language early in her life.  Angie and I both speak Mandarin at home, and so Kate’s mother tongue is Mandarin. When she was 1 years old, we hired a babysitter […]

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cate, parenting

Kate: the first year: diet

Angie took the red pill: She started reading the Super Baby Food book and she decided that we will be making all of Kate’s food ourselves. I was lazy and didn’t read the book but the basic principle was that you want lots of colors in the food you give your baby.  There are about […]

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cate, parenting

Kate: the first year: Elimination/potty training

Kate is 4 years old now, I’m ready to finally share with the world about how Angie and I decided to raise her.  Our choices and methods are extreme and it caused us a lot of isolation with other parents, but it was all worth it. When Kate was 3 month old, Angie and I […]

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cate, travel

Kate: having fun traveling

It was not an easy trip for her.  Jet lag, grumpy parents, long walks during metro transfer, parents who want to walk thru Amsterdam without a stroller..  but I think she had a blast eating her way thru both Paris and Amsterdam.

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cate, parenting

How to discipline a 4 year old

We are traveling in Paris with kate, my 4 year old daughter, I need some advice. 1) She likes to ask ‘why’ endlessly I can’t get a moment of peace. And she would either ask the same ‘why’ question to something I’ve already answer or she would follow an answer with another ‘why’ 2) She […]

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cate, parenting

Kate: a happy child

When someone asks me how Kate (my 4 year old) is doing, the first word that always come out of my mouth is ‘she is very happy’.  It’s pretty amazing that this kid is always happy. Very little gets her down.  When she and I get into our disagreements, it takes me half a day […]

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