My advice to you, dear daugther

Dear daughter,

For your 18th birthday, and on my 48th year, I wish to write down something for you to refer back to in the next 30 years.

I wish to tell you a few simple thoughts to help you to build a life for yourself that 30 years later, you would look back and be proud of the person you have become at 48 years old.

  • Don’t be scare that you don’t know your exact future, life cannot be planned exactly.
  • Make decisions based on a long term view, it’s okay to have fears and doubts, but frame a decision based on whether this is the right decision 5, 10 or even 20 years later.
  • We all have only one life, live your life on your own terms, but do seek advice from several people you trust. Then make the decision and trust your gut. You have made several big decisions that way and it has worked!
  • Live your life with no regrets. Sure you might have made different decision looking back. If there is something you wanted to correct, do it now. If you cannot change the past, forgive yourself.
  • You will always be your worst critic, make sure to be kind to yourself.
  • Always be creating, art, writing, or something else. This is you!
  • Lastly, you never know who will say YES, until you ask. Everyone has fears. I know you have fears. I live with fears all the time.

Dad

Tony Tam (Li Zhi)

Senior Principal Engineer @ Splunk, ImpactfulEngineer.org & SFBadminton.org